It's been a while since I've tried to write in a blog properly, but today's probably a good occasion to start again...

Today is my 2nd anniversary at my "new" job-- also my first full-time job outside the publishing industry. In 2 days, FYGHM will be 10 years old; in the spring 2 years ago I finally played The Silver Case and got on Twitter; sometime next month, I'll be mailing out the 2nd issue of GhM Zine. It was also 2 years ago that I quit my old job to go to school full-time (which would have been GREAT if it had worked out but also oops I needed healthcare).

Looking back, obviously the work/school things are major, but I don't want to underestimate the effect that these fandom things have had on my life either. Since going back to my GhM roots in 2018 I've really felt like I've re-embraced my own creativity: I'm reading again, I'm writing again (fic AND poetry wtf), I'm making OCs and stuff, overall just having fun with fandom again in spite of all the headaches that necessarily arise in, you know, the online. Video games aren't really my home, but GhM always has been, so it's been good to have this base while so much stuff has been changing in my real life. And idk, I like a lot of you people.

It sounds kind of silly, but it's also been good (?) for me to be (?) on Twitter (???) at this moment. YEAH I KNOW TWITTER SUCKS, but like. Hear me out. Leaving progressive publishing and academia then sliding into hopelessly neoliberal corporate is not good for the brain, and yes, Twitter is worse, but being able to observe some semblance of current politics and the world through NEITHER of those lenses has been important as my own feelings and opinions shift. I'll be honest about being as optimistic as I am: not entirely naive, but very optimistic. As frustrating as it can be to see all the discourse (and I mean the offline shit, haha hell no abt irrelevant fandom stuff) it's good to keep myself in check and remind myself to stay critical on all fronts.

2019 and 2020 haven't been amazing, but, like all other years, they've both been vital to my growth and development. Also, damn, I did not know I was gonna miss even the pettiest shit I was dealing with in 2019 after THIS hell year... I would deal with morning traffic again to get back to life pre-COVID. I know this period of my life is winding down soon-- next year is when I really start to apply to schools-- so I'll enjoy it while I still can, even as I'm stuck at home with most of the rest of us.